With pocket money from Giota, Nikolas gets by for the week

- The farces of *pothen esches* - hamboulla’s arsenal - averoff’s “great school” - the wrinkles of utter hopelessness

ALPHANEWSLIVE

– The Farces of Pothen Esches

– Hamboulla’s arsenal

– Averof’s “great school”

– The wrinkles of utter deadlock

Good morning, everyone. I don’t know about you, but this public disclosure of lawmakers’ “Pothen Esches” declarations has caused a lot of family drama. Someone read that Pamporidis has 26 properties inherited or gifted by his parents (a 6-story building, houses, an apartment in Athens, and a whole bunch of farmland) and went to ask his father for an explanation as to why he hadn’t left him anything. All hell broke loose!

Similar cases have been reported involving several other members of our parliament and their inheritances. Such as Odysseas, with 22 properties (quite a few in the occupied territories, of course), Fotini Tsiridou with 12, and others as well. And just think—they have siblings too, and obviously their parents passed on similar assets to them as well. Is the guy who confronted his father in the right—or not?

The best part of the “Declaration of Assets” reports, however, was that of Nikolaos Papadopoulos, who reported deposits totaling 788 euros! In fact, across three accounts (535, 102, and 151). Gossip has it that Giota gives him pocket money every Monday to get him through the week. Not enough for a coffee, not even a cheese pie… that’s about it. Reports that Dimitris Baros (with deposits of 16,928) offered to help him have not been confirmed.

Two other cases that are laughable. Zacharias Koulias listed in his declaration only the six fields, the one building, and the one house he owns in Rizokarpaso—and nothing else! No car (does he take the bus to Parliament?), no bank deposits, nothing. Just a huge debt of 824,509 euros! To tell the truth, I felt sorry for him. But what about Fotini Tsiridou, with a debt of 1,254,663—how does she get by with bank deposits totaling just 2,162 euros? Hey, maybe we missed something and misunderstood these people.

What is Evgenios Hamboullas’s most valuable asset? His guns! He declared a total of 11 hunting and air guns, with a combined value of 98,000 euros! But what good are the guns when his favorite catch is caught with nets? And the leader, Christos Christou, who drives around in cars that look like armored vehicles, declared only one Mazda 6 worth 2,000 euros. It seems to me they’ve caught on to us and are pulling a fast one on us.

And while all this is going on, the young AKEL MP Ephraim Christou has become the subject of commentary after declaring bank deposits totaling 10.32 euros. That’s just how it is—in Cyprus, it’s more ethical to have money and hide it than to not have any and say so clearly and plainly. And for the cynics out there, the man filed his declaration as soon as he took office and before his parliamentary salary began.

But let’s change the subject. We just had that huge spectacle with Averof Neophytou—are we really going to focus on Parliament now? The guy is off the charts, as the kids say. He wrote an entire script: I’m driving the car, we arrive at Pindarou Street, I open the trunk, and the assistant pulls out the cart, onto which he begins to load the boxes of signatures slowly and ostentatiously, I close the trunk and follow the assistant with the cart to the office entrance. We deliver the boxes, and I make statements about unity, my fellow candidates, and George (Pamporidis). Meanwhile, I tell the reporters to have their cameras and cell phones ready to capture the whole scene. In any case, if this whole thing doesn’t work out for him, he could easily excel as a communications strategist for “big-name” politicians. For Trump, for example…

Almost the entire party leadership has also signed on with Averof. Some of them are sure to sign on with George Pamporidis as well. I note, however, that missing from Averof’s list are Famagusta MP George Lysandridis and his fellow Paphos native Nikoletta Konstantinou.

Why does it seem to me that after every meeting with Erhurman, the wrinkles on our President’s face increase? Is it because they can’t see eye to eye, or perhaps because he’s beginning to realize that he’ll be heading into the elections with the Cyprus issue at a complete impasse? And there, of course, he’ll face a barrage of criticism from all his opponents. That’s how it is: when you deliberately put something off and when you believe you’re playing a much bigger game than simply talking with the Turkish Cypriot leader, there comes a time when you’re presented with the bill. And by then, it’s too late.

I said it last week, too: even the Turks have caught on to us. After the Turkish media mocked the President for “chasing” handshakes and photo ops with Erdoğan and Fidan, Erhurman has now come out to say that he doesn’t want talks just for the sake of photos, making a clear dig at Nicos Christodoulides. As we’ve said, communication is good—as long as it’s backed by substance. Because, let’s face it, the EU recently announced a major intervention “at the highest level”—only to admit a few days later that the meeting between Kaya Kallas and Haka Fidan yielded nothing. And so, the only hope left now is Olgin, with whom the President made sure to “get into a spat,” criticizing her for not spending enough time in Cyprus.

Amid all this, the possibility of Joe Christodoulou running for office has also emerged. The best thing the successful businessman said, however, was this: “My mind is with DISY, but my heart is with AKEL.” Something like Nazim Hikmet, in other words. “If half my heart is here, doctor, the other half is in China”…

Have a good Sunday. Start enjoying everyone’s pre-election antics, because otherwise these 16 months will drag on forever. And don’t forget our President’s message: “Others are thinking about the next election; we’re thinking about the next generations”…